Monopoly and the many strategies

After the longest time, we sat together to play: you, me and your dad. We played a game of Monopoly. The transactional wisdom you shared during the game was phenomenal. It’s not about how much you gave to buy or how much you got, it’s about how you handled the giving and the receiving. Every single time you bought a property or paid rent (when there was an expense), you ensured that you got some cash in return. Where did you get this strategy from? And, when you realised you were trailing a little bit, you joined hands with me-collaboration! You said, “wait, let me pay for this”, taking chances between paying from my pile and yours. Thank you for being you.

Gone...Just like that - a Journey of wind waving through joy!

 You are gone
Just like that.
- no announcements,
- no bidding byes
- no visitors
Just like your many travel adventures

Are you traveling with the wind?
But, you were always the wind
Blowing gently, but swiftly:
Between academics, politics and social causes.
- A destination less, passionate travel
- A wind that fuelled the flight of the many birds

Are you traveling to the Great beyond?
But you were always beyond:
No strings attached, no boundaries
No compromises, no enforcements.
- Relentless pursuit of the beauty in the ordinary
-An Everwilling joyspreader

You are so many in one:
Constant explorer of truth,
Consistent enabler of change,
Committed empowerer,
Crusader of social-equality,
- to list a few.
Yet, you won yourself like no other:
The enormous strength in your emotionless fight
Bearing witness.

You are gone.
In a style so typically you:
No regrets, no pride.
No attachments, no bitterness.
Just the joy of leaving.

Dearest Dr

 Dearest niece

It is just like yesterday that I saw you in Dr R's lap, tutting the honey she fed you. You have grown - from being that tiny baby that we all tried to put to sleep using several methods (1hr of cradling, riding etc), the infant who wouldn't swallow that ball of rice for more than a hour, the little girl who would demand live butterflies for toys, go shopping for veggies (Munga, maanga: funnily, my masters lab technician still remembers this and checks on you citing this episode), the school girl who would wade away boring times with travel breaks, the several funny episodes from Kids Club (competing with your Science teacher's daughter), the hiccups as you moved to Tuty for high school and the stress you endured during Higher Secondary and MBBS - What a breathtaking experience it has been, to see you grow from that tiny pod to the young lass you are! If I am given a pot of your growing years and asked to pick a memory - I'd choose the one of you hanging onto my dupatta, as I took the bus, only to be bribed with Lacto King as you returned home.  

And your growth has been phenomenal - physically, professionally and experiential - more phenomenal than I would have imagined!  And I am mighty proud of the way you have grown up to be. You are at a pivotal point of your life now! All that you were, made you who you are. Given the choices, it takes consistent hard work to reach there - and you did it in style! 

Starting today, you need to make choices for yourself, for many others, and work consistently towards the choice. This can be fuzzy and quizzical for a while, just hold on and you will ace through it. Making choices is a journey, actually. For some choices, you may have to stick ground, persevere and never waiver; For some, you may have to reassess, realign with time and may have to make changes. And you need to choose these two pools wisely. Being wise needs a lot of inward search - the more you indulge in this quiet inward search, the less frustrated will you be, and more clearer will your choices be! Be driven by that inward search.

There are certain stuff that I wished I was told and informed when I was 20 - stuff I have realized while running on the mill 20 years after. I am sharing them with you, just so you don't regret not being informed, while wading through life:

 1. Stick to your principles. Grow that grit. Consistent hitting with the hammer of your principles will make you a leader in the long run! 

2. Expand your field of vision. Given a certain situation, have a wider perspective of it - zoom out and have a birds eye view, with a longer term in mind. Train yourself to just watch and have a wider perspective.

3. Defer judgement: New avenues will emerge if we just watch at emerging events/situations, without any judgement. 

4. Value yourself: For the longest time, I have misunderstood humility for willful subjection. Not worth. The whole world is driven in the pursuit of their own self, and that is NOT wrong. Always, put yourself and your principles above everybody. Value yourself, and never ever compromise your values and your worth. Don't ever allow you to be mistreated. Nobody is worth that.

5. Embrace change, always, always: Change is the most inevitable part of life - don't be hesitant to change, especially, when it is inward driven. People who really love you will stand by you regardless. the others- they will be initial complaints, but they will eventually hop onto your side, seeing the value. The world evolved, with such changes - one person, one change at a time. So, just embrace change and keep moving.

6. Ask, and the world will respond (if not oblige): If at all you need anything, ask. To whoever it is. The world is a  lot kinder than we think it to be. By asking, we have let our wish out. While the world is not obliged to provide us, we can exercise our right to ask.

7. Give freely and with open arms: Face the world with open arms, and be ever open to share your experiences, your perspectives. Worst case, give your time and lend your ears where required.

8. Modulate, and wrap it up in humour - everything!

9. There is life beyond academia: Having been with academia for a longer time, I believed that academics alone can take me beyond. But, life taught me that in the larger scheme of things, academics is a ticket, but not the vehicle/whole journey. Relish the journey.

 10. Have fun! 

Life is not a roller coaster as many people say. It is a simple connection of events, and how you respond to each isolated incident. Choose how you respond, and have lots of fun!

My very best wishes, Dr KMMV. Take good care, of yourself, and your world. Go, race! 

Lots of love as ever

Me.

But

 When we want to accomplish something, our thoughts generate a list of but, but we should walk through the but and prove our but 

Gifted

 

Movie: Gifted by Marc Webb

Platform: Netflix

Synposis: A little girl, with extraordinary math skills, is being nurtured by her maternal uncle. They share a wonderful bond – the uncle having given up his lucrative life (taking up a lowly job) to nurture this child (he doesn’t even reveal this “sacrifice” at any instant, until a stranger finds it). The ambitious parent of the uncle wants custody of the child, and the film's premise is on a custodial battle between the heart (The uncle) and the brain (the grandparent).

My take: The movie is beautiful. After a long time, I got involved in a movie and watched it. The relationship between the duo, centred around the value and beauty of the “ordinary” and the strength of human relationships – makes it all the more beautiful. The little girl fit into the role really well, and Chris Evans has made a humane role of Frank, more humane. An understanding Roberta, the very simple lives and relationships all of them share are a breeze in the world of mystery. A few scenes are worth mentioning: The conversation between Frank and Mary on the subject of faith and  God, the discussion on ‘spur-of-the-moment’ utterances, the surprise visit to reveal the joy of Mary’s birth, Frank’s tolerance to pet Fred although he is allergic to cats - are all great lessons on parenting. The screenplay may sound low, but such scenes are strong to carry the weight of the whole movie. The final message on: When it comes to an adverse condition of ensuring joy of the living, Vs honouring promises made to  the dead, it is ok to compromise the latter than the former.

A lovely movie after a very long time.