புது+அகம் = புத்தகம் :-)

 ஒற்றைக் கண்ணோடு, 
இருண்ட விடியல்களின்
வழிப்போக்கனாய் அலைந்தேன் நான்.
ஒலிகளின் வலித் தாளாமல்,
சொற்களின் மாளிகைக்குள் நுழைந்தேன்:
அங்கு...
ஒவ்வொரு கதவுக்கும் பல சாவிகள்;
ஒவ்வொரு சாவிக்கும் — ஒரு கண்!
அவை திறக்கத் திறக்கப்
பலக் கண்ணனாய் உருமாறினேன்.
ஓராயிரம் திசைகளில் வெளிச்சம் பாய்ந்தது,
மழைத் துளிகளாய் மனதினுள் விழுந்து,
அகத்தின் பாவங்களைக் கழுவியது.
என் உள்ளத்தின் வெளி விரிந்தது,
பனித்துளி படர்ந்தச் சுவரில் தோன்றும் எழுத்துகளைப் போல
எனக்குள் தடம் பதித்தன சொற்கள்!
நித்தமும் என் அகத்தைக் குளிர்வித்த
‘புது அகம்’ அளிக்கும் புத்தகங்கள்:
 பேரருளாளர்கள்!

Grateful Heart

AMDM is a project that I was leading so passionately, that was passed over to my team member when I was on leave, without my knowledge. It was excruciatingly painful because the project was very dear to me, and my own team member backstabbed me.  Ever since AMDM and even before, I had a grudging bitterness for the colleague, and couldn't even see him in face - it was always a boiling rage within me. Couldn't gather myself to forgive him. It was always flooding with bad emotions everytime I happened to see him. Even today, when I hear AMDM or any developments along that direction, it tries to provoke me. 

Until I encountered Matt 18 on the Easter day. The Lord spoke to me - if I forgive you of everything and you still hold on to old grudges, would that not bother the Lord. As usual, my raging mind began it's logical arguments. But I submitted myself to the Lord and said that I will go to him and make a closure to the bitterness. As difficult as it was, I did as was instructed. 

Now, it's not my load anymore. The Good Lord will take care of everything. He will guide me. He will make me shine, beyond all the filth, beyond all my transgressions, beyond all my pains and shame. God IS powerful. Amen!

Place is not physical

 I used to crib about the futility of living in the current and express a strong desire to go somewhere deserted, where I will not know anybody. 

Until I recently realized that I can just clear up my mental space for newness to flow in. Place isn't physical. Place and Space are mental. Renew in a new place everyday.

Even if I go to a new physical space where I know none, I'll eventually get to know them and then I need to look for new pastures. 

As long as "I" remain, the challenge will remain no matter how many times I relocate. Renew in spirit and be reborn..every single minute. Every day